Careful what I wish.

“So many techniques, all equally crass, to make the gods appear. And when they give in, what do you do? Extend the bowl: ‘Give us rains. Cattle. Sons. Wealth.’ As though one defined human beings by their wanting…That’s why when the moment comes I shall confront Indra in silence. For that, it is essential that one shed all human weakness. Be alone. Absolutely on one’s own to face that moment. Become a diamond. Unscratchable.”
–Girish Karnad, from play Agni Mattu Malé (a tale which you may recognise better as film Agnivarsha)

Lacking the dramatic and literary flair of Karnad’s prose, I nonetheless hesitate to ask the Divine for anything, with similar reasoning: He is there, and beautiful, and wondrous. Even the eyes that gaze with calm sweetness from his picture are a gift. What more shall I ask?

Yet studying requires money, and studying in India enough money to transplant myself abroad. So I asked, of the One who opens the way to freedom, let me earn the means for my studies. Help me find an opportunity; I will work hard if given the chance.

This was a month ago, and today I started a new job. I will be working two full-time positions, one to live here and now, one to save for a future existence there.

So, please bear with me in the next few weeks, as I struggle to adjust to this sudden boon! I will have to carve out “blog time” – somewhere between bedtime, bus time, and all of the new points of the clock that now demand my attention.

Jai Śrī Indra Deva!

© Arjunī and ridiculously reverent. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Arjunī and ridiculously reverent with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.


11 thoughts on “Careful what I wish.

  1. Satya 03 April 2012 at 12:33 Reply

    Karnad is an ass, always happy to make brahmin bashing movies. That said,

    Good luck dear. Kunda miss said you cd stay with her and she will share her simple life with her. Dont die from overwork. Good luck with visa and all.

    • Kāmya 15 April 2012 at 14:51 Reply

      “The Fire and the Rain” is the only play of his I’ve read so far, but it contains the sort of dramatic tension an actor dreams of playing out. If he’s made a career off of gratuitous brahmin-bashing, though, it’s time for me to “consider the source” before reading any more…

      Thank you for the well-wishes and for reminding me of Kunda Miss’ words; staying with her in that peaceful place would give me tremendous happiness. But I will work hard, and save, and arrive with everything I can, as long as I have to wait for citizenship anyway! And will deal with the visa mess when the time comes. :)

  2. Curious 03 April 2012 at 12:37 Reply

    All the very best for all your endeavors !! Bestest wishes !!!!

    • Kāmya 15 April 2012 at 14:51 Reply

      Thank you so much!

  3. Mahalaya 03 April 2012 at 19:22 Reply

    What a wonderful quote and so true. What would we do? I would probably try to sing.:P

    Though i will miss you, i am also so very happy you now have the means to snare your dream<3

    • Kāmya 15 April 2012 at 14:58 Reply

      I am doing my best to doggedly continue with replies, even when weary – after all, part of work-related exhaustion and stress comes just from worrying about it, not from actually working hard! Caught up on some HDF posts and messages tonight and now am tackling the blog…

      It is a brilliant quote, though spoken by a man so driven by ambition that he commits terrible deeds, and stands in stark, cold contrast to his pure and warm-hearted brother. (Spoiler alert: In the end, Indra does appear, and offers boons…to the innocent brother. Because Indra is awesome like that.) The drama of the play is intense and grapples with some important questions – though unfortunately, I have now been told by two Indian readers that the author is a jerk, with ulterior motives in his writing. :/

      • Mahalaya 16 April 2012 at 01:16 Reply

        It’s okay, even a jerk can have a moment of wisdom. Even the fool spouts wisdom occasionally:P

  4. Friend From the West 04 April 2012 at 08:15 Reply

    Hari Om my Friend,

    So glad for you and your work for purpose of the Absolute.

    Please take good care.

    Om Shanti


    • Kāmya 15 April 2012 at 14:59 Reply

      Thank you, my friend. I appreciate you reading my blog and offering your caring words. I am not sure if you’re leaving online correspondence altogether or just HDF, but either way, I wish you speed and grace in your journey to the Divine. With your kind, wise heart, I am certain that you are already well on your way!

  5. V V S Sarma 09 April 2012 at 14:51 Reply

    Veda part is for material life leading to Vedanta (upanishads) for silent prayer to the Almighty. They are but steps of evolution
    I should thank your website for making me aware that Maghavan is Indra.
    Recently I discovered the name Kamya in Lalita Sahasranaama, the
    1000 names of Mother Goddess.
    I fully agree with Satya – Girish Karnad is a Govt-Intellectual, who makes secular noises, considered politically correct, in one word, an ass and there are many such.

    • Kāmya 15 April 2012 at 15:15 Reply

      It seems to me that there is beautiful prayer in the Veda part, too. The Vedic ritual is the offering of dravya, but also of one’s energy, time, bodily effort and mental focus – all that a person values in life – all given in service to the Almighty.

      I mean to discuss the name Maghavan in a future post, or at least write down what I’ve read about it. It’s an interesting word, and my favourite name of Indra’s.

      I have not read the Lalita Sahasranāma, so thank you for that knowledge! I do remember seeing the name in the Kālī Sahasranāma, a while back.

      And as I wrote to Satya above, it is disappointing that Karnad is this way. As a (former) actress, I know that interesting, competently-written plays with dramatic dialogue are hard to find…but it’s best not to support works written by those with ulterior motives.

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